She Needs Me

I know this sounds dumb and foolish. But she needs me. I can't leave her. After we married, I discovered that she was unable to sleep through the night most of the time. Memories of abuse that had happened to her in the past would haunt her dreams. She would often wake screaming in the middle of the night, terrified and in a panic. I would hold her, help her wake enough to resist the dreams, and comfort her to sleep again. All these years later, the nightmares are much less frequent! But the thought of sleeping alone still scares her. She is sooo helpless at these times. She's like a little child who needs help, shelter, and protection.

When her temper progresses, she usually turns to a phase of self recrimination. At these times she has beaten her head with her fists or against a wall. She needs love. She needs, and I supply a loving hug that stops her from hurting herself. She never saw this from her parents. She needs a loving parent to let her see her own value. All other people who could do that role in her life have abandonned her. Until I came along. I will NOT abandon her. I will help her and stay with her even if it kills me.